Without the third shot, you’re the same “murderer” you were before the first two.
Author: Sodom Sun
In a bid to become the headquarters of the new Covid religion, Australia is hot on the tails of New Zealand and America.
The Covid faith is the assurance of eugenics hoped for, the conviction of germs not seen.
“Porque Covid!” is being offered in every part of the world as a complete answer and explanation for every question and problem that has ever existed. Scientists say that “Porque Covid!” may provide even more critical insights into the questions of life, the universe, and everything than forty-two ever could.
rt as our first official fact-checker. In his damage control video below, the “Covid Truther” Stephen refers to is none other than The Sodom Sun. The article that put the ball in motion was published on June 14th, 2021.
Covid has the whole world seeing red. But not enough blood-red says the Red Cross, who is refusing blood donations from the vaxxed.
Often misunderstood to be a complete worldview, libertarianism is an application. So powerful and far-reaching are its effects that many libertarians mistake it for an operating system. However, like all applications, it must be run within an operating system. Without one, it’s unlikely the libertarian app can run at all, let alone reach its full potential.
Times change, and so do the meaning of phrases. As most conspiracy theories have come true, the phrase has become synonymous with ‘spoiler alert.’ Enough so in widespread usage that the 2021 edition of the Merriam Webster’s Thesaurus has made the connection official. The new synonym follows on the heels of the phrase ‘conspiracy theorist’ being officially simplified to ‘thinker.’ These linguistic developments may surprise those not aware of conspiracy theories. However, we may now view such people properly as non-thinkers. By the same reasoning, people who don’t want to hear any more conspiracy theories may be viewed as people…
“It’s mother’s white gold. Second only to unvaccinated sperm, un-vaxxed breastmilk is shooting up the commodity charts!” says Natalie de La Fontaine of local nursery GoodMilk. “The only thing our customers want is pre-Covid and certified unvaccinated breastmilk. Our phones are ringing off the hook!” The Poisoned Breast? “Smart mothers don’t feed post-jab milk to their babies. They’ve heard the horror stories of the shedding that occurs after the mRNA shots. What could be more revolting than mommy getting jabbed and dripping poison into her newborn’s mouth, right from her own breast?!” Is there anything else contributing to increased demand?…
The latest imaginary hobgoblin to scare women, child, & beast has burst onto the scene at the speed of a corporate blog post. To date, no specimen of the original SARS-CoV-2 virus has been made available for testing and verification. Therefore, we’ll have to take the state’s word for its little sister Delta Δ¹, who promises to be a real bitch. In fact, she’s already being deployed to scare the bejesus out of believers and non-believer alike. (Editor’s Note: As of this time, the Sun has not uncovered how many variants it will take before a fully centralized government can…
“We are proud to announce the eligibility of all Covid–19 jab recipients to purchase exclusive shares in the national ‘Bridge to Nowhere’ Project,” shared BTN spokesperson Noh Pointe. A Perfect Match Sun: Why are you limiting share ownership to recipients of the Covid–19 jab? BTN: The mindset of jab recipients is a perfect fit for BTN ownership. The project is experimental, solves no apparent problem, is made from unknown materials, is unlikely to reproduce, and goes precisely nowhere. Sun: Are there any other characteristics for “Bridges to Nowhere” that fit the covid-jab recipient profile? Yes, jab recipients have complete trust in the powers…
The Sun was contacted by a Post-Modernist debtor (PMD) who is upset with a bank that loaned him a substantial amount of money. The bank insists that PMD must repay the money he was loaned. PMD: I’ve tried everything to make them understand. I mean, if I don’t exist, then how could my loan exist? So obviously, it doesn’t. But these uneducated fools have no grasp of philosophy or meta-narratives. Sun: You sound frustrated. PMD: You better believe it. Every college freshman knows Foucault taught that it’s meaningless to speak in the name of — or against — Reason, Truth, or Knowledge.…
A recent poll Gallup poll concluded that extremely few Americans place their faith in politics. Sun: Surely you mean 13 million or even 13,000? Gallup: No, 13 people, total. Sun: Were your pollsters surprised by the results? Gallup: We thought it might be in the hundreds, at least, but were wrong. Only 13 actual Americans still believe politics is the answer to any problem. Sun: We’re confused. Every day we hear Democratic congressmen and senators espousing political solutions to just about every problem in the universe?! Gallup: Recommending a solution and believing it will work are two very different things. Most of the representatives you’re referring…
“We shouldn’t have to become atheists just to shop at the grocery store. But that’s what this new law would accomplish,” explained Pastor Mulcahy. Lawyer for Sodom Baptist, Timothy Gillespie, explains, “Under the proposed law, Christians would be atheists by default and need to get an approved religious exemption to become Christians. Otherwise, they would not be able to enjoy the use of public spaces.” Timothy continued, “The 1st amendment guarantees freedom of religion, not freedom from religion. We’re hoping this whole thing is a huge misunderstanding. But with organizations like FFRF or Freedom From Religion Foundation, we’re not so…
In a twist to fill the American belly and lessen their workload, the FBI made a major announcement today. The FBI will now deliver a free large pizza to anyone who calls the 4S hotline and hangs up without saying anything. The Sun spoke with FBI agent Wayne Tarrance. “Look, that whole ‘See Something, Say Something’ thing was DHS, not FBI. But ever since Janet Napolitano ran her mouth about it, our phones have been ringing off the hook. People think it was an FBI campaign, but we really could not care less about federal crimes.” “Solving federal crimes is…
“If it’s too high, they won’t hire anyone. That means the real minimum wage is ZERO!” shouted Camila Vallejo, president of Sodom’s Student Federation, after Professor Sowell’s presentation on Real Economics. According to Wiki, “Sowell discovered an association between the rise of mandated minimum wages for workers in the sugar industry of Puerto Rico and the rise of unemployment in that industry. Studying the patterns led Sowell to theorize that the government employees who administered the minimum wage law cared more about their own jobs than the plight of the poor.” Sowell concluded that showing support for a higher minimum…
Ruby is the descendant of Spanish islanders who were kidnapped by the Barbary pirates in 1640. And Diamond is the descendant of Muslim slave traders in Northern Africa who could have been involved in the slave raids in Europe. Thousands of such raids were undertaken by the Barbary pirates in Iceland, Malta, Spain, Ireland, Italy, and the Netherlands to keep Northern Africa stocked with white slaves.
“It’s the new white gold. Forget about BitCoin; the real money is in unvaccinated sperm,” shared Sam Yankwell of a local sperm bank, GoodSeed 4U. “Nobody’s interested in post-jab material; all they care about is pre-Covid and certified unvaccinated samples. Our phones are ringing off the hook!” Are these customers educated on the science? “Our customers are from the highest educated demographic. In fact, our first customers were the very scientists and manufacturers paid to formulate the Covid jabs. They understand the human tests were skipped before rushing to market the various concoctions referred to as “vaccines.” Is there anything…
It’s official, the Islamic Patent Office in Cairo is shutting its doors. There just aren’t enough applications to justify a full-time staff. We have scientific publications coming out of Turkey, Iran, and Egypt. Still, only a tiny trickle of applications have been submitted.” explained Fatima Faiza. Experts cite a range of factors contributing to the demise of intellectual property in the Islamic world. Low literacy rates and confusion over Sharia law are among the most obvious. However, other factors include the youthful complacency of oil-rich countries, the inability to concentrate in the desert heat of the Levant, and the Islamic…
“DQ hour at the library was getting boring,” complained Claire Voyant, queen reader for story hour. “Every week, the same costumes, rainbows, and gay indoctrination stories. Then one day, in the middle of ‘Heather Has Two Mommies,’ a Catholic story broke out.” “Turns out one of our queens was a priest. The kids asked about his dress, and he said to think of it as a Halloween costume. Then the priest starts telling stories about the origin of Halloween and how it used to be called “All Hallow’s Eve” because it was on the eve of All Saints Day. When…
The Sun’s last working definition of Conspiracy Theorist was “a person who doesn’t trust proven liars.” With Ian’s testimony, we’re shortening the company definition to “doublespeak for “Thinker.”
UBI Recipients may now resume all activities without using arms or legs, the Administration says, including most indoor and outdoor settings. Asked if the new policy was restricted to work-related situations, the Administration elaborated: “We mean not at all. The recipient will not, at any time, in any way, be required to use their arms or legs for whatever reason.” “Universal basic income makes no distinction between “deserving” and “undeserving” people when making payments. The Administration is extending that policy to remove the requirement that people to use their arms or legs.” Is the Administration implying that people don’t need…
The Sun sat down with El Diablo himself and was surprised to learn he’s depressed. Sun: What’s up, Big D.? Satan: Don’t call me that. “Satan” is fine. Sun: Ok, Satan. Satan: I’ll tell you what the problem is: Hell is a thousand years ahead of schedule, and it’s depressing. Our Clock Management has been terrible. We didn’t expect people to be this gullible. Sun: Mmm, nice to be over-estimated for a change. But isn’t being ahead of schedule a good thing? What more do you want? Satan: Idiot…we want the same thing humans want: more time! When the Son…
“When I found out I had the clap, I thought my sex life was over. But the covid passport got me back in the game!” shared Kevin DeCline. “I was lying low, trying to figure a way to break it to my dates. Then I realized my matches didn’t really care. That’s when I went for it, got the jab, and featured my new passport credentials prominently on my profile.” “It really puts girls at ease. With me, they know they won’t be part of that three-hundreds of a percent who have to stay home, NetFlix and chill for a…
On Tuesday, two dozen members of the Hollywood chapter of NOW sat down with Sun Staff Reporter Kim Candoo. It seems the #MeToo movement made it tough for a while, but things are returning to better than usual. “Don’t get me wrong,” blurted Tracy Tatonka, an experienced lesbian buffalo known for stampeding first and asking questions later. “At first, I wanted to strangle the first Star Effer I saw. Then it hit me: we all put the same ass on the line, but only one in a million of we feminists can parley a few sessions into a half-billion smackers!”…
On a recent call to Satan’s headquarters, Wormwood told the Sun he was considering “an official recall of earth-deployed field-workers due to lack of Enemy targets.””My emissaries are wandering for weeks to find anyone even mildly under Enemy influence. We may be approaching a time when it no longer makes sense to keep more than a handful of field-workers as a ceremonial holding force.” Asked if this included his famous protégé, Wormwood pointed out that “Screwtape’s rank and experience put him at the top of the recall list.” Continuing … “He’s done well, but it’s time to come home.” Asked…